Your child is sitting bolt upright, screaming, eyes wide open but completely unseeing. You try to comfort them but they thrash harder. After ten minutes they fall asleep and in the morning remember nothing. This is a night terror, and it's far more distressing for the parent watching than the child experiencing it.
Night terrors vs nightmares
Night terrors happen during deep sleep, usually in the first few hours. The child may scream, thrash, and have their eyes open but they are not awake and won't recognise you. No memory afterwards. Nightmares happen during lighter REM sleep later in the night. The child wakes up, is aware and frightened, and can usually describe the bad dream.
Handling night terrors
Don't try to wake your child, don't restrain them, and don't try to comfort them. Stay calm, wait nearby, let it pass. Most last five to fifteen minutes. Trying to wake them often makes it worse and longer.
Scheduled awakening
If terrors happen at a predictable time, gently rouse your child fifteen minutes before. Do this every night for two weeks. It disrupts the sleep cycle enough to prevent the episode. Remarkably effective for many children.
Handling nightmares
When your child wakes from a bad dream, they need reassurance: a cuddle, calm voice, confirmation they're safe. For older children, describing the nightmare during the day and giving it a silly ending can reduce its power.